My mother did not like to fly, so we always travelled by ship if we could. I blame her for my insatiable desire to go on a cruise.

When my parents moved to the Caribbean they usually sailed on the Geest banana boats to get them safe and sound back to the UK for their holidays.

However, there were times that the boat schedule didn’t work out for them, and they had to fly on British Airways. This was the only airline my mother would fly on. We had tried to recommend other more reliable and reasonably priced alternatives, but BA it was. It was a losing battle.

Then one night, as my parents were about to fly from Barbados to London, their British Airways jet blew an engine, and that was that. There was no way the plane could fly. They were stuck in Barbados, and their holiday plans in the UK were looking like they were not going to work out.

But there was hope on the horizon. There was a Virgin Atlantic flight to London later that night. They could still be in London in time for whatever pressing engagement they had. My mother declared that she would never fly on a plane with a naked woman on the fuselage. My father added that it would be a jolly poor show to do so. And they both agreed that they would have nothing to do with that awful little philanderer, who as Tom Bower had said in his first book on Richard Branson, was a “foul, foul piece of work”.

Ever since Virgin Atlantic started flying the friendly skies, my parents had been against them on principle. It had been hard to work out what that principle had been, except their rather biased opinions of Mr. Branson himself.

Miraculously, the gate agent persuaded them that despite their misgivings, Virgin was actually quite OK, and so reluctantly my mother and father boarded the red-tailed plane, and headed off to the UK.

Well, the rest is history. They discovered that although it was certainly not what they expected, Upper Class on Virgin, could actually be described as superior to Club World on BA. Better champagne, friendly staff, delicious food, “one could almost forget about that naked lady”.

They had finally found an airline that they actually loved. Naked Flying Lady included. Come to think of it, I don’t think she was actually naked, scantily clad maybe.

Somehow subconsciously, I must have absorbed my parents original misgivings about all things Virgin. When Virgin Voyages arrived on the scene with the Scarlet Lady, named after Virgin Atlantic’s 2nd plane, I never thought we would actually sail with them. It all seemed way too brash and edgy for my liking. Give me afternoon tea in the Queens Room, and a Milky Way martini in the Commodore Club at night. I really don’t need any razzle dazzle in my life.

But then the reviews started coming in. People were talking about the very innovative cabins, hammocks on the balcony, no plastic shower curtains, fabulous food, free wifi and included gratuities, all you could eat ice cream. Proper ice cream, not soft serve from a machine that doesn’t work half the time. I was intrigued. Then I read that when you use the Virgin Voyages app once you are on the ship, you can shake your phone, and miraculously a waiter would appear with a bottle of champagne for you. It didn’t matter where you were on the ship. OK, now you are talking my language. I bought a new iPhone as my old one wouldn’t support the Virgin Voyages app, and booked a 5-day cruise out of Miami.

Then I discovered that you actually had to pay for the champagne. No worries. Now I just have to find out more about the Scarlet Lady for myself. The ship is described as “sleek, sexy, cheeky, sophisticated”, none of these adjectives apply to me at all. I lie awake at night wondering what is in store for us………

Dominican Daze

That’s the name of the cruise I booked. I’m not sure it bodes well for how we will do on this voyage – I certainly don’t want to come out of it dazed at all.

Here’s the itinerary

September 16th                      Embark in Miami

September 17th                      At Sea

September 18^th                       Dominican Republic

September 19th                      At Sea

September 20th                      Bimini Beach day

September 21st                      Disembark in Miami

Short and sweet.

Let the preparations begin…………………