April 5th

Malacca

Lacking in Malacca

We were at anchor in Malacca, so Brian and I went down to the Queen’s Room at 8:15 as they said they would start giving out tender tickets at 8:30. We were given tickets for the 2nd tender, so we happily settled in to read for a few minutes while the guests on tours went ashore. We waited and waited. Then the announcement came that there was a delay in the Malaysian officials clearing the ship. More waiting. Finally the ship was cleared and we were waiting to be called to our tender, but then we found out that the officials had decided that we could not use our own tenders to go ashore, but that we would have to use Malaccan vessels. More waiting. Finally at 10:30 we were called to our tender. It turned out to be a bright yellow airless, rickety vessel, whose seaworthiness was in doubt. I was concerned that it would turn into a yellow submarine, but I was wrong, we finally arrived at the pier.

At the pier we had to fight off an army of taxi and trishaw drivers The trishaws were totally over the top, they were very brightly decorated, many with Hello Kitty and Pokemon themes, all blasting out strange music. We are certainly not in Idaho anymore.

We decided to walk into town instead of taking a taxi or trishaw. Some time later we realized we didn’t have a map, Google and Apple Maps weren’t working on our phones, we had no money, and we were lost. It was over 90 degrees and very humid, and my knee was hurting. It felt like something out of the Great Race. How to find the town square before anyone else does without any idea of where you are going or how to get there.

We continued to be upbeat about our situation and continued walking. Finally we reached an area where there was cellular service, and we were able to plot our course to the town square using our phones. There is an information office in the town square where we could buy a map, and thus make our day of sightseeing easier. It was only a 13-minute walk away, and we were sure we would find an ATM so we could pay for the map, and museum entrance fees, on the way.

Walking in Malacca was quite a challenge. Where there is a sidewalk it is very uneven, and there are gas pipes all over just waiting to trip you up. Then there are the open drains, conveniently placed for you to fall in as you try to avoid buses that are driving way too fast and way too close to you.

Despite the dangers of being a pedestrian in Malacca, we did find an ATM, but things didn’t go well at all. When Brian put his card in, it promptly spat out a message stating that the card was expired, and it was retaining the card. So there is another thing to check before you go away on a long holiday – when do your credit and debit cards expire? There was nothing we could do about it, but at least we now had guidance on the phone, so we continued on towards the square, discussing where on earth would we be able to get money to pay for the rest of our shore days. We never did settle that one.

Now the phone was showing that we were 17 minutes from our destination. We thought that must be because we were walking slowly, so we carried on following the phone directions. We walked for a while, and then the phone directions showed that we were 22 minutes from our destination. Very odd. We checked that we had not missed having to turn off the road, and reassuring each other that we had not, on we went. The next time we checked our directions, we were now 25 minutes from our destination. Then Brian had a brainwave. We were HEADING IN THE WRONG DIRECTION. DUH! It is most concerning that 2 relatively intelligent people hadn’t come to that conclusion earlier. Now knowing where we should be going, half an hour later, and nearly 2 hours since we arrived at the pier, we had reached our destination.

Luckily there was a currency exchange in the square so we were able to exchange some dollars. The square is very pretty, with a central fountain and LOVE statue (like the ones in Philadelphia and Indianapolis), and is surrounded by the bright red buildings of the Stadthuys and Christ Church. The Stadthuys was built in the 1650’s by the Dutch as the Municipal Town Hall and Governor’s residence, on the site of an earlier Portuguese building. It has had various makeovers and alterations during its lifetime, and now serves as an Ethnography Museum. The Christ Church was completed in 1753, is one of the oldest Protestant churches outside of Europe. It is interesting that no nails were used in its construction.

There was a service going on in the church, so we didn’t go in, but decided to walk up the nearby St Paul’s Hill to see the ruins of the lighthouse and St Paul’s Church.

Outside St Paul’s Church there is a statue of St. Francis Xavier. At the ruins you can see the location where the saint’s body was buried temporarily in 1552 waiting for monsoon seas to subside prior to being exhumed and reburied in Goa. Before burial, the corpses’ right arm was removed and sent to the Pope in Rome. I am sure the Pope must have been thrilled. Coincidentally (or divine intervention?) the statue was hit by a falling tree in 1954 and lost its right hand.

We then walked down to hill to the Porto de Santiago gate, all that is left of the Portuguese built fort, A’Famosa. It was a 16th century stronghold which was destroyed by the Dutch.

After that it was museum time, and Brian went to visit the Maritime Museum, housed within a reconstructed galleon, while I decided to sit in the shade and wait for him.

We had hoped to do a river cruise, but with our delay in getting off of the ship, and getting lost, we realized that we didn’t have time for this, so we did the oddly named Manara Taming Sari ride instead.

This is a real winner, and has nothing to do with taming out of control saris. You sit in an enclosed circular viewing platform that gradually rotates as it ascends a tall tower. It shows you wonderful views of Malacca and the surrounding area. I wish we had done this first as it gives you a great overview of where you want to go.

Then it was time to return to the ship. Luckily there wasn’t much of a queue to get on to the tender, and there was ice cold water to drink while we waited. Back on board we decided to cool off in the Lido Pool and listen to the Dixieland Jazz sail away music. The pool turned out to be very warm, so I thought I might as well sit in one of the hot tubs and be really warm soothing my now sore feet. It was perfection.

With everyone back on board we pulled up our anchor, and we watched us sailing out to sea again.

At dinner we found out that Veronica and Norman had had to wait for an hour and a half in that intense heat and humidity for a tender at the end of their tour.

I really enjoyed our day in Malacca. If we had been more organized, and had more time, there was so much we could have seen. However I am wondering if with the clearance delay and tender debacle, Cunard may be giving it a miss next time.